Nasty Political Radio

For years I was tormented by NPR. Its demonic intrusions into my life were long, ongoing & utterly irritating. I mean, I hate NPR. Okay, so I know that really it isn't NPR that I hate so much as the situations in which I was forced to listen to it. The simple fact is, I am not political. Which apparently marks me as something of a rare bird amongst my acquaintances. The times during which my ears were sullied with NPR, certain of my fellow listeners were politically-minded, & frequently had a sort of tunnel vision to go along with the political platitudes. There is nothing that drives me crazier.

So I must admit I'm thoroughly baffled by the fact that, on my morning commute, I (1) decided I wanted to hear NPR & (2) actively sought out the local station that would be airing it. True to form, I recoiled at the familiar strains of the morning music, but then I kept listening.

My reactions to this morning's broadcast are as follows:

• It seems the Pittsburgh Steelers have a lot of female fans. The announcer mentioned pink jerseys. If that's the case, thought I, well shit, I'm going to become a Steelers fan. Alas, a quick Google search revealed that the players don't actually wear pink jerseys - they are just sold as merchandise, designed to appeal to women. Oh well. I think the Chargers have the prettiest uniforms - the powder blue & gold? Mmm hmm. Too bad they're "throwback" uniforms. Whatever that means.
  
• Iraq. Oh, Iraq. I know it's a bit ostrich of me to not know much about what's going on. But I've always thought the whole gambit was incredibly stupid. I have little patience for or interest in things I find incredibly stupid, for better or worse.
• Why the hell do people live where hurricanes & other natural disasters not only occur, but are par for the course? I know it's mean but I can't help thinking that they fully deserve whatever travesties befall them. "Oh honey, I've got a great idea - let's move to the heart of hurricane country! Sure, our house may have its roof ripped off. Sure, we may get a bunch of flooding. Sure, our insurance will be expensive as fuck & not actually cover most of the hazards. Let's do it anyway!" Retards. Maybe it's nature's way of winnowing?
• Oregon rocks! Sorry. I always took a bunch of pride in things Oregonian while growing up. We just didn't figure all that much into the national scheme of things most of the time. I was super-proud that Tonya Harding was from Portland. (And I took a bit of malicious glee when the trailer trash tart beat up the New England Vera Wang-clad princess. I admit it!) This time apparently Nancy Pelosi (who is the speaker of the House & therefore presumably a Democrat, though I know nothing else) was in town talking about energy stuff. And she was just raving about Oregon's energy policies. How awesome we are. I don't know. I think it's cool that other people think Portland is cool. Because Portland is cool. As is Oregon in general. The New York Times has, like, a huge Portland-centric hard-on. (Last month, it was PDX's friggin' tea scene. This month it's Stumptown Coffee. And about once or twice a month for the past year they've had an article on Portland.) The BBC did a segment on our public transportation ("The City Where the Car is not King"). It's nice, particularly since I so recently came around to Oregon. I don't regret living on the lesser coast for 10 years, because it allowed me to fully realize & appreciate how much I love the West Coast, & how much better it is for me. Now I'm only in danger of becoming a complete snobby jackass about it. Oh, wait. Shit. I kind of already am.
  

So anyway, I recently turned five. Er, I mean, twenty-nine. I've already had the "WHAT?" conversational experiences. I slept all last weekend (naps, even!) to recover from my previous several weeks of severe activity & lack of sleep.

My question is: Is this another thing that happens when you get old? You wake up in the morning & crave National Public Radio?

If so, I've gone from graceful acceptance to sheer terror about this whole aging thing. I knit. I have cats. I take multiple medications. What could possibly be next?